Resident Evil 3: Extinction (2007)

Can only come up with two positive things to say about this movie: the exterior settings are nicely dressed in that desert-apocalypse sort of way, and the movie isn't any worse than the second. I could ask what the point of this film being made might have been, but it's been obvious ever since the (abysmal) second movie grossed $51 million domestically. So what do we have here? Awful effects, acting that ranges from apathetic to aggressively bored, action sequences edited so poorly that the only reason you know the heroes are okay is because they're heroes, logic gaps that make the Grand Canyon seem like a flesh wound, and a zombie pimp. It's the kind of movie that thinks its audience will fall into a narcoleptic coma if something loud doesn't happen every forty-five seconds (I'd like to thank Yahtzee Croshaw for that line), while at the same time finding new ways to murder suspension of disbelief with yet another piss-poorly assembled fight scene. When the best the film can throw at you is a bit toward the end that seems “okay” instead of the usual “root canal bad” you seriously start to wonder if the millions of dollars spent on movies like this might not be happier living in a fireplace.

2 out of 10.