Fantastic Mr. Fox (2009)

Simply put, this is as appropriately named as a movie could possibly be. Films by Wes Anderson can be a hard sell to some people—his penchant for darkly deadpan delivery means that it can sometimes be too easy to take him seriously. Not so here, as the mix of whimsical stop motion, smartly written kid-friendly tale, and infectiously low-key characters create a sense of unexpected calm amidst the considerable chaos. This is not a film that goes for the big laughs and the big excitement, but rather nudges itself along with a sly wink and a charming giggle. It is at times both pedestrian and ironic, while simultaneously being impossible and straight-forward. This is a very smart film, fully capable of instilling wonder in adults and knowing smiles in children. There is not quite enough drive to push this excellent movie into classic territory, but in almost every way this is a beautiful, thoughtful, delightful ride for anyone who likes their entertainment with a touch of subtlety.

9 out of 10.

Watership Down (1979)

Respect for an audience can be a hard thing to come by in an animated film. For as many talking bears, singing princesses, and pieces of anthropomorphic silverware as have been drawn for the screen, few are given the chance to breathe and be part of something bigger than mere archetype. Watership Down is not a perfect film, but considering the time it was made and the general story, it's amazing that there was any consideration to make it more than just another kid's film, let alone a full-blown thriller. Seeing a group of rabbits strike out on their own to found a new colony wouldn't be this tense if it had been in more market-minded hands. But there's a confidence here, and a sense of respect enough for the laws of nature to show things maybe not as they really are, but as the could be. It's dark and it's violent sure, but it's honest, and doesn't let tragedy break its stride. Though at times it may seem more interested in how a rabbit moves about than in telling its story, there's definitely a sense of weight and intelligence to be appreciated.

8 out of 10.

Dragonball: Evolution (2009)

Perhaps the most shocking part of this film is that it isn't garbage. Nobody is going to come out and say that this is a triumph of cinema or anything, but this generally unnecessary live-action remake of the wildly popular martial-arts action cartoon has a thing or two going for it. Best among them, a complete lack of taking itself seriously. The characters, the situations, even the costumes all reference back to just how preposterous everything is. It gives the film a breezy air of silliness, resulting in a pleasantly kid-friendly series of fights, sprinkled with light humor. The production values aren't half-bad either. None of this changes that it's generally a stupid movie with a nigh-incomprehensible story and dull action sequences, but the camp value the film knowingly dumps on the audience is, if nothing else, excellent grist for drunken cynicism.

4 out of 10.

Kung Fu Panda (2008)

With all due respect, Dreamworks is simply not known for delivering on the same level as Pixar. They always output very competent films, but the writing always feels more spastic, the storytelling more forced and less meaningful. Then along comes Kung Fu Panda, a movie that takes the studio's trademarked shallowness and turns it into an asset, delivering a light and breezy martial arts fable with just enough characterization, just enough action, and just the right kind of wit. It's a bout of perfectly pure entertainment, funny and exciting throughout. It is absolutely gorgeous too, telling its story of a goofy panda's quest to become a martial arts master with a sense of artistic flair steeped deep in Chinese iconography. For some solid laughs, a bit of time with fun characters, and some beautiful visuals, this is an excellent way to put a smile on.

8 out of 10.

Ponyo (2008)

Also known as Gake no ue no Ponyo.
Once again, legendary director Hayao Miyazaki shows us what's possible with animated films. Pitched similarly to the classic My Neighbor Totoro, Ponyo is a tale perfect for children, and a solid dose of enchantment for the inner child as well. The story is a familiar one, as it is based on the same book as Disney's classic The Little Mermaid. Miyazaki's take on the “fish-person wants to be human” story is significantly different however, even if the central conceit is the same. It's not a musical for one, and the entire production has a danger-less, carefree feel. The palette is full of warm blues and friendly yellows coloring characters that simply accept the situation in front of them with little question, and tied with a brisk pace that helps the whole thing go down easy, if ultimately inconsequential. It is pure escapism, crafted with a sure hand and obsessive eye for detail. Every moment of the film appears hand drawn, with Miyazaki's aversion to computer generated imagery in full swing. There may not be a single computer animated frame in the entire film—a true rarity in this age—and the result is a visual masterpiece. Even so, the story and childish tone may be a hard sell for demanding adults. If you have a playful inner child who can enjoy lush scenery with pretty colors and adorable creatures, you will definitely finish this with a smile.

8 out of 10.

Howl's Moving Castle (2004)

Also known as Hauru no ugoku shiro.
Seeing something completely, utterly new and unique in a movie is a rare thing. It's also Hayao Miyazaki's stock and trade. This tale of warring wizards and a young woman cursed into old age is so inventive, so eye-popping and fresh that there's hardly any room left for a coherent story. Make no mistake, at every turn and in every scene there is a new kind of magic or spell being cast that results in a careening trip through a dazzling array of color and lights, beautiful hand drawn landscapes, or a perfectly animated transformation effortless in its character and subtleties. There is genuine enchantment to be had. But the story itself suffers for it, with large leaps in character logic and a world absolutely begging for further explanation yet receiving almost none. It creates an interesting yearning, an expectation that all the answers the movie expertly baits you into anticipating lie just around the corner. In that way it's a mildly frustrating film, but while it may less of a Miyazaki masterpiece than its peers, this is still filled with that trademark wonder, and near perfect beauty.

7 out of 10.

Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince (2009)

You can tell a franchise has gone on long enough when you start to see the quality cycles in which it runs. James Bond fans will know what I'm talking about. Here is a series that began with a halfhearted nudge out of the gate, picked up speed by the third film, and was at a full-on gallop by the fifth. Someone must have hidden some Ritalin into everyone's morning coffee for this outing. Unlike the better entries, Year Six at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry feels lethargic and drowsy. It lacks the excitement and surprise and fascination with itself that made the third through the fifth movies so engaging and charming. This one feels detached, with acres of dead space between the characters and the events, sparse highlights of barely conveyed emotion, and moments of action that feel designed to distract the audience from nap time rather than contribute to the story. You could argue that maybe there's too much story to tell in this, yet the previous film did a fantastic job in the telling and the source for this is almost a third shorter. Whether or not the magic is gone, it seems to have skipped over this entry.

4 out of 10.

Spirited Away (2001)

Also known as Sen to Chihiro no kamikakushi.
One of my favorite scenes in all of cinema occurs late in this film—it's a quiet character moment on a train as the scenery passes by on a waterlogged horizon. Joe Hisaishi's excellent score slows to little more than a somber piano, and an attentive viewer is given a chance to breathe a bit, take in the entirety of the story to that point. Much of this tale of a girl lost in a world of strange spirits is filled with such verve and energy that for it to press on the brakes and weave this piece into the palette brings the magical absurdity of the story a sense of weight. A lot of strange things happen in this movie, but like all Miyazaki's films there is a patience in the telling, a casual lack of urgency. It doesn't need to shove you through one moment in its eagerness to get to the next weird thing, but relishes in the detail and the world. There are weaknesses however. As wonderfully bizarre as the events onscreen can be, there are barely any moments to flesh out the world in which they inhabit. And much of the ending feels like an attempt to solve a riddle that was never asked in the first place. But there is truth and beauty in this coming of age tale, and though it may have a few cracks on the surface it is no less touching or satisfying.

9 out of 10.

Porco Rosso (1992)

Also known as Kurenai no buta.
Quietly understated, full of gentle grace and starring a group of pleasantly complex characters, this film manages the hat trick of being a true kids' film meant for adults. Taking place in the Mediterranean between World Wars, this story of a grumpy pilot cursed to live in the form of a talking, smoking, complaining pig strikes all the right notes. There is never a forced moment, it is neither condescending nor disrespectful of its audience. It is an easy, relaxed movie, filled with the wonder of the open skies and yet firmly grounded in the calm demeanor of the chain-smoking hero. It's also quite touching, subtly lamenting on the melancholy and stubbornness of middle-age, and times long gone. While this may be an animated film, filled with bright colors and happy, energetic people, any kids in the audience will likely find themselves restless. For the grown-ups in front of the screen, however, there's a sense of a calm hand and a knowing smile.

9 out of 10.

Kiki's Delivery Service (1989)

Also known as Majo no takkyûbin.
Even when legendary director Hayao Miyazaki is at his least effective, his style is still quite enchanting. Here he tells the coming of age story of a young witch off on her own for the first time, learning the ropes of life's triumphs and failures. Nothing, and yet everything is charming. The most fantastic parts of its mildly supernatural plot are told without any effort, and the result is a feeling of everyday magic, of a normal grounded in the incredible. It's all framed in a summertime kind of beautiful, with lush greens, and deep ocean blues—the art here is exceptional. It does lose a bit of ground, however, as it moves into the third act. What little conflict there is feels appropriate, but the resolutions feel forced and cheap. Interesting characters are well developed, but under-used. But somehow it barely matters. Somehow it's just a few wrinkles in on a lovely package. It may not be perfect, but it is very satisfying.

8 out of 10.

My Neighbor Totoro (1988)

Also known as Tonari no Totoro.
Sometimes the best things really are the simplest. Here is a film that essentially doesn't have a plot and barely makes any sense whatsoever, yet is absolutely full of effortless charm and childlike wonder. At every turn this movie seeks to delight and tickle the kid in everyone. And yet, this may not be for all audiences—the simplicity is both its greatest strength for many, but its greatest weakness for others. This is a very basic story: two kid sisters and their father move into a house next to a forest that may be haunted by very friendly, extremely adorable forest spirits. And that's it. That's literally the entire story. The following ninety minutes are merely the two sisters living their lives as children; one goes to school, they have arguments, they get in to innocent trouble. It's all extremely mellow and calming and filled with beautiful depictions of the Japanese countryside and pleasantly surreal encounters with the forest spirits. For those with a need for films with meat on their bones, this probably isn't for you. But for people who are strongly in touch with their inner child, or who are children themselves, this has a carefree innocence to it all that will bring nothing but smiles.

10 out of 10.

Castle in the Sky (1986)

Also known as Tenkû no shiro Rapyuta.
Grand and sweeping, with a score to match, this is an adventure in the tradition of the greatest of kid's films. The third movie by the legendary Hayao Miyazaki is so pure in spirit, so unpretentious, and so gleefully simple that it delights at every turn. It's frequently beautiful too, lending this tale of a mythical floating castle and the forces competing to find it a sense of summertime grandeur, from the intricately detailed mining towns to the titular castle itself. The characters within are almost all excellent as well, with the English dub of the film featuring stand out performances from James Van der Beek, and Cloris Leechman. The only real shame of it all is how derivative and predictable much of the plot is. You can see all the twists and turns coming a mile away, and while it removes none of the fun of actually seeing these things carried out, there isn't a lot of surprise to be had. Still, for the beauty, the expansive escapade, and just the sense of frivolity to it all, this one is tough to match.

8 out of 10.

Up (2009)

One of the things that makes this film so interesting is how it shows that even at their worst, the beloved animation studio Pixar can still enchant. Much like Wall-E before it, Up is strongest in the first act. It quickly spins up and creates an absolutely incredible and emotional prologue, telling a complete and remarkably touching story in the opening moments. From this expert beginning, however, things have trouble maintaining that sense of quiet dignity. As the main character, a grumpy old man fed up with life and people, decides to make a grand escape in a house held aloft by balloons, quiet subtlety gives way to high adventure, and while the emotional underpinnings reverberate throughout the remainder of the film, the beginning feels at odds with what follows. As things become more and more ridiculous, what started in one form jerks its way into a new one that doesn't feel nearly as sincere. That said, even at its lowest points the movie remains completely likeable, with the surly protagonist giving a great contrast to the kid-centric Disney heroes of old. While the heart of the film may sputter and slow, even a sloppy hand can't take away the solid smile and fantastical whimsey that is signature in every Pixar production.

7 out of 10.

WALL·E (2008)

At points charming, thoughtful, and uplifting, WALL-E is that rare beast: a Disney film with a message. Earth is in ruins, humanity fled to the cosmos, and left behind to clean up the mess is a single, lonely robot, eternally doing its duty to clean up our mess. And the rest goes from there. It's a simple premise and, for the first forty minutes or so, carried with a sense of grace and presentation unusual in a the genre. The desolate world and its inhabitant are rendered with a sense of melancholy and sympathy that is simply beautiful to behold. This pitch-perfect storytelling doesn't last, however, and though the turn for the worse doesn't make a good film bad, it does take away a considerable amount of its character. Yet the movie going forward still has its message, and a few others too, including some that a few in the audience might even take offense to. But there's a sense of risk and verve in this work that feels truly honest, and frank, and even sometimes important. At its worst, it's a great film. For forty minutes though, it's a brilliant one.

9 out of 10.

The Spiderwick Chronicles (2008)

One could say that this is film is making the best of a bad situation. Basically you've got an awful script filled with every kind of kid's film stereotype, a trio of too-precocious youths who are having family trouble (side note: I used to think I was unique in growing up with divorced parents. If kid's films these days are any indication, it's frighteningly common nowadays), a disbelieving parent, and of course the token adult who's in on the conspiracy, played here by a curiously miscast David Strathairn. Yet, despite the generally terrible writing, everyone (except Strathairn) plays their part with such furious conviction that it's not hard to get swept up in the fun. Not only that, but (and this part genuinely surprised me) the action scenes in this film are truly intense! Much of the rest of this fairy tale is your basic kid's film fluff: tons of the now-standard fantastical special effects and “kids can overcome anything” proselytizing. So it all adds up to a mixed bag for adults; the action is great but there isn't a lot else here. But the film's target audience will likely be enthralled (and appropriately thrilled) for its entire runtime.

7 out of 10.

The Water Horse: Legend of the Deep (2007)

As far as kid's films go, The Water Horse is above average, but not particularly special. While I give it a lot of credit for taking a largely unexpected direction toward the end, ultimately this isn't much more than an adorable cross-breed of Jurassic Park and Free Willy. All the characters are broadly telegraphed stereotypes: you've got your oblivious parent, a pile of supporting cast members who all know something is up, the rogue adult who's in on the whole thing, and a generic precocious youth determined make things right. Also there's a cuddly, made-for- marketing Loch Ness "Monster" that is so damn lovable you can taste the saccharine. It's all here and for the most part it plays out exactly how you'd expect it to. That's not all bad news; the effects on the titular Water Horse are exceptionally well done, and while the pacing is probably a bit slow for the youth of today's ritalin-based diet, the patient will likely enjoy the predictably precious affair. There's not a lot that stands out from the crowd here, but what's here works in spite of its stock elements to deliver a family film that gets by almost solely on cute factor.

6 out of 10. (but it's a very cuddly 6)

The Star Wars Holiday Special (1978)

Before The Empire Strikes Back had a chance to solidify the series' place in cinema history, this catastrophe happened. There simply are not words for how absolutely awful this made-for-TV cash-in is and remains. That it continues to exist thanks to someone's 1978 VCR and the eventual advent of web-based video is nigh on an epic travesty, and under no circumstances should any loved one or trusted friend be made to watch any or all of it. Honestly it should come with the kind of warnings reserved for narcotics and a card with a suicide hot-line's number on it. That it has names like Art Carney and Bea Arthur attached to it just adds to the overall embarrassment of seeing a beloved classic turned into a low-budget musical. No amount of damage supposedly done by the Special Editions and the Prequel Trilogy can ever match the sheer abuse this two hour turd visits upon this universe. Star Wars creator and geek paragon George Lucas once said that if he had enough time and a hammer he would destroy every copy of the bloody thing. After having seen it myself, Mr. Lucas I am willing to buy you that hammer.

None out of 10.

With Rifftrax:
With that out of the way, fans of the now defunct Mystery Science Theater 3000 TV show and movie would actually be doing themselves a favor by heading over to www.rifftrax.com and downloading the alternate audio track. Rifftrax are simple mp3 files that you play alongside a given movie, where three or more folks make snide comments basically tear the film a new one. In the case of The Star Wars Holiday Special, the Riff turns an intergalactic meltdown into two of the funniest hours you could reasonably ask for. Hosts Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy and Bill Corbett manage to pull together an absurdly hilarious miracle in turning the movie's dialogue (or lack thereof) against itself. While it certainly can't rescue an established cataclysm, it drags this Holiday Hindenburg up enough to make it something you won't bring up in therapy later.

With Rifftrax: 1 out of 10. (by the way, the version of the SWHS you'll want to use for this runs about 1 hour, 57 minutes or so, and still has the vintage commercials in it)

Alvin and the Chipmunks (2007)

From the director who brought us the second Garfield movie comes a movie adaptation of a cartoon show whose only redeeming quality is the innovation of taking Christmas carols and bumping them up two octaves. Wonderful. I question the wisdom of adapting an 80s toon that, at this point, is at least a generation removed from the audience this film is targeting. And what a train wreck it is! Sketchy CG chipmunks with high-pitched voices terrorize and warm the heart of a clearly-desperate-for-a-paycheck Jason Lee while “wacky” and “hilarious” “hijinks” ensue. There isn't a single moment when this cinematic catastrophe is either amusing or worthwhile. It's all a calculated attempt to repackage pop songs and sell albums, which is ironic since the movie is about fighting against that exact thing. I'll give that it may entertain small children, but the poor parents who will be escorting the only audience that could appreciate this turd will be lucky to make it fifteen minutes in before wondering if their time might be better spent getting a head start on their taxes.

2 out of 10.

Ratatouille (2007)

It becomes obvious, once you break down what it's about, why this was almost the least profitable Pixar film released to date. Fine dining in a Paris kitchen that has a rat as the chef isn't the the most marketable concept for a kid's flick. Rats aren't exactly cute and cuddly, and fine cuisine isn't something that an 8-year-old is typically interested in. But who cares? This is superb filmmaking, and another example of why director Brad Bird (The Iron Giant, The Incredibles) is considered among the most talented artists working in animation today. While it contains little of the big budget adventure styling of previous Pixar efforts, the heart and story shine bright. The focus is intimate without being pretentious, and the humor is imaginative and intelligent but never in bad taste (beyond rats eating garbage, at least). It still has a few moments of typical kid's film silliness, though even here they had the good sense not to overdo it. Left field subject matter aside, as a smart movie that all ages can enjoy it will simply make you smile from start to finish.

9 out of 10.

Enchanted (2007)

Someone must have slipped something into my burrito this evening. As much a cynic as I am, as awful as the promotion of this movie was, and as contrite the plot devices throughout the film are, Enchanted still managed to be pure magic. How can this be? It starts by not sugar-coating the real world side of things. The vision of New York is certainly edited for a PG rating, but what's shown is pretty much as-is, and is sometimes quite brave for a family film. The satirically savvy script, while fairly predictable all the way through, still manages to throw a few smart curve balls while keeping the characters in tight focus. The gags never overpower the story, which is always a good thing. Likewise, the cast is solid from top to bottom. But I think it all winds down to Amy Adams as the ridiculously naive, eternally perky, and stunningly earnest Giselle. The entire movie rests on her performance, and Adams throws herself against it with a level of bravery and unabashed gusto not seen since Johnny Depp first put on a pirate's hat. There's really no reason why a film about cartoon contrivance running headlong into real world weariness should have been anything but another forgettable piece of family film fluff. Somehow Adams and crew managed the hat trick and put out one of the best Disney films in a decade. Happily ever after? You bet!

9 out of 10.